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Fighting · in · Green · Fields
Throwing knives, anyone?
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I MADE IT!!!!!!! DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG DELTASIG VPPE SVP VPPA VPCS DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP DSP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So now that I got that out of my system - I am officially a brother of Delta Sigma Pi. Wow, that was literally the most difficult 3 1/2 months of my life to date. I plan on taking it real easy this summer and next year as well. I should have gotten paid for all the shit we had to do. If anyone has seen The Devil Wears Prada...there are multiple scenes in that which show the lead girl running around in heels, trying to accomplish 20 different tasks in a 10 minute deadline - I can't emphasize how EXACT that has been to this semester, and all due to this Fraternity. But honestly, I've learned so much from the process. I'm much more professional, I get shit done on time, I'm early to meetings, I work well in groups, and I have a better understanding of how to run an efficient organization. Hell, I even like having interviews now. I plan on taking this to ZTA and my fencing club almost immediately, and certainly into the business world later on. I don't think I've ever felt this accomplished. Yay! |
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So, now that I've found around 20 minutes to pause and think, I decided to write a quick post. Let's recap all that has happened in the past few months. - Went to Las Vegas for my 21st birthday. Had a blast.
- Started up school again, was involved with UrbanKnowlogy 101, Zeta Tau Alpha, and the Fencing Club.
- Decided to pledge Delta Sigma Pi. With that, my "life" kind of ended, as now I just run around trying to get stuff done before deadlines, and prepare for our massive Sunday meetings...of death. Everything borders so close to hazing, but somehow I see all the results that come from everything they make us do, and I know that this is a good way to push myself. I have sacrificed my friends, my sleep, and UK for this process....I had better make it in. Also...I think I'm gaining weight. Now, I know when I last weighed myself I sort of cheated, as I had just eaten and was wearing shoes...but damn! Is that from all the stress???? Sheesh, I can't wait to start going back to the gym. On a side note, people seriously disappoint me. Maybe I shouldn't be so general, or maybe I'm being too harsh. I don't know. It just makes me sad when I see people with such potential, and they do nothing with it. Oh well, 2 more weeks of this process, then finals, then then I'm FREE. |
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Of what? Dating. Well, in a sense. I have extremely high expectations. I always have, yet when I've dated I've pushed them aside to allow for something, anything, to happen. And it has, and granted it had it's good moments...But I'm not going to ignore what I want anymore. And if I can't find that in this world, then I'll just wait around for the next. I love being single. LOOOOOOOVE it. On the other hand, I love my fake man. I don't even know how to describe this. I suppose certain recent events has spurred this on, but honestly....Women try so hard. We literally alter ourselves to be better, and not just for others, but for ourselves. We see some beautiful woman on tv, and we then try to look like her. We read about some badass female character in a book, and we train to be more like her. I have yet to see this same phenomina with men. If I'm going to try this hard, whoever I'm interested in next is going to have to try just as hard. The key to this, I'm convinced, will be that whoever it is will being trying hard on his own, and won't look to me for guidance. Yeah, this probably didn't make any sense. Oh, and one of my newest pet peeves - Don't hit on someone as if you closed your eyes, flipped to a random page of your high school yearbook, and landed on their picture. It's annoying.
Current Mood: |
 In love with Howl | |
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Went to work at the Chantilly store this past Saturday night. It was just like any other Saturday night at GP, except I did something AWESOME dealing with one of our "customers". To give some background, he is a shady character who comes in to game, never spends any money, and loves to give hugs. Those who know me, know I'm not a fan of hugs. But let me emphasize how much this "customer" likes hugs - He will walk in, look around, and if he sees a girl that he knows he can get a hug from, he'll stay. If he doesn't see anyone, then he leaves. If I'm there, he'll hover around the register, waiting for a hug from me (I try my best to ignore him/ act busy/ actually be busy). There was one time where we were closing, and I was cleaning the tables, and he literally waiting behind at each table I cleaned, hoping for a hug. But did he help me put up chairs? No. So Saturday night he comes in, spots me, and after waiting near the register for half an hour, attempts to go in for the kill. Usually, I give him a hug, then go into the back room and freak out about it. This time, I stood where I was and told him "Hey, I can't give hugs anymore. It's a little unprofessional" and then offered him a handshake. I didn't expect his reaction, which was a weird freak-out where he refused to look at me for the entire night after that. Only later did I find out that one of our other employees (who is a woman) has stopped giving him hugs as well. It was GLORIOUS. Honestly, these little victories make my world go round. That and talks of a second Serenity movie :D
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cheerful | |
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... keeps no record of wrongs. I'm not one for religiosity, but I can appreciate some of the lessons shown through the good book. I like this saying, in particular, because I feel that this is an area of my life that I need to work on. My temper is too quick, and it's causing me undue stress. I had a great talk with Latoya tonight, and we vented about....well, just about everything. I'm really proud of her, and all her sacrifices that she's made recently. She is an incredibly strong person. I cannot make this clear enough: I love this semester. I can't wait for it to end. Tomorrow..or today, rather...will be hellish, I'm sure. I'm excited to see what will happen though. Oh, and I've decided what my superpower would be, if I could have one. Silly as it is, it'd make life a little less...dramatic.
Current Mood: |
 tired | |
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There is so much to do, and I'm only hurting myself as I sit here and write in this instead of working. My financial situation is devastating to me. Much of it is pride, I know. But my pride is where my drive comes from...in any event, I'm dying for a free weekend where I can work for hours and hours and hours. I'm usually on top of all that stuff. I get initiated into Zeta Tau Alpha this Saturday. This is Initiation Week, where apparently the world ends for me and my pledge class. We have an event that we're hosting for the entire sorority this Friday, and I don't even know what we're doing. Apparently I'm in charge of making up and teaching everyone a dance...but I don't have time for that. But, we'll see how it goes on Friday, I can only hope for the best. I love this semester, I really do. It has easily been the most exciting, stressful, action-packed semester yet, and I'm shocked to see that it's actually November. I know that I want to stick with all the activities and groups that I'm a part of now, so I know exactly how I'm going to lay out my schedule for next semester. Maybe I'll even join the co-ed Business Fraternity...but that takes up a lot of time too, I'm sure. I can't wait until Thanksgiving Break, and I'm even more excited for Winter. I love snow, and I love the "feeling" of Christmas. I plan on getting into the festive spirit a lot this year :D I'm quite happy with where my life is right now. I love my major, my friends, my room mates, my family, my activities - everything is perfect. I wouldn't want to change a single thing, and I don't think I will for a long, long time. Ok, work time for real now.
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cheerful | |
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I'm trying to think of a character to be for this halloween. The extent of my creativity has led to the possibility of being either a 3 musketeer or one of the fruit of the loom guys. In other words - I'm out of ideas. Help please :D
Current Mood: |
un-creative |
Current Music: |
Stronger - Kanye West | |
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Had the first round of auditions last night for UrbanKnowlogy. We auditioned three pieces, and I didn't make the cut for any of them. Not that this isn't unexpected, but I did get my hopes a little high. We are auditioning a few more pieces on Wednesday, but I'm confident I won't make those since I'm not as familiar with these dances as the ones we performed last night. Oh well. I like being single. I get all sorts of opportunities to help myself in ways I never knew. And now, I get to go through disappointment alone. I like having only myself to depend on. I mean, I know I have friends who are there for me, and I love them, but this is slightly different. In any event, I kind of like it. I believe that is strengthens my character and, if anything, my resolve. I plan to keep working on the pieces we already auditioned for, and maybe with a bit of luck they'll put me in the show. If not, I know there are a lot of other performances that UrbanKnowlogy will be in. And I'll perform in at least one of them :D
Current Mood: |
 thoughtful | |
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I stopped rushing sororities today. I wouldn't have, if my top two had called me back. But they didn't. A large part of me is relieved; I was really only doing this for my father. Yet, rejection is always troublesome, and I've been thinking about it all day. I'm pretty sure I had a bid from both of my top two last year...so what changed? ZTA I can understand..hell I turned them down twice already. I was going to join Chi O....in the end, I'm both happy and sad. I never thought I'd say that about anything sorority-related. UrbanKnowlogy practice tomorrow.....I love these dances, but DAMN. I don't know how I made it through auditions. Our first performance is at Midnight Madness here on campus on Oct. 12th. I hope I make the audition for performing (yeah, I made the team, but now I have to try out before every dance in order to perform). I really want to perform at the Patriot Center. That would certainly be a highlight of my....life :D A cute guy sits next to me in my Management Lab. He's awfully nice. But, I've sworn off men...for the time being. It kills me that I can't go on adventures. All I want to do is run around and travel and do things that not everybody gets to do. Hell, I'm a half-hour away from party central. No one will join me. Granted, there are good reasons...but isn't being wild and crazy what being young and free is all about? People look at me like I'm crazy when I propose an idea to them. Oh well, I'm going to need to learn some crazy martial arts, so that I can go out and do things by myself...and not die. I think I'm going to look into the co-ed Business Fraternity on campus. They seem fun, and it deals with my major. I wish I had a secret place that I could go to for some alone time. Teddy Grahams = amazing :D
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sleepy | |
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Life throws a curve ball at you. I've had a few recently, most of which were not pleasant, yet I've learned from all of them. This new one will probably be my toughest yet, and I can't wait to take on the challenge. SO, here is a lengthy and detailed account of how it happened - - -
((Well, I was going to put a cut here, but it's late and I'm tired and don't care to figure it out right now))
TUESDAY -
I wake up nervous. I know that at 7:20 that night, I'll be attending my first 3 hour clinic for a prestigious hip-hop dance group on campus. I've had years of dance experience, sure...but nothing like this. I tried to go about my day as normal...I went to work, and then attended my two classes. It's tough enough having only 10 minutes between these classes, and then 10 minutes between the class and the clinic...I was running around all day, and was worn out before the clinic even began.
Now, maybe someone out there can get where I'm coming from with this - you know when you think you're good at something, and then you spend some time with others who can do the same thing you can, and you realize that you are terrible at it? Yeah, I instantly had that at this practice. Everyone was good. Everyone was a dancer. And it seemed that everyone was going to make it onto this dance team...except me. On top of that, there were tons of people there. And not just people trying out...this was a SPECTATOR event. Tons of people were just standing on the sidelines, watching and, more importantly, judging. I felt awful, and ended up leaving the practice early. I can only take so much humiliation at a time.
After I got back to my apartment, I decided to practice the dance I had just learned. I knew that I wasn't going to make the team, but I at least didn't want to go in there and mess up a dance that I knew, with practice, I could do.
WEDNESDAY -
I woke up nervous...again. I had originally woke up early for work, but instead decided to stay at the apartment and practice for a total of 4 hours. You'd think that with all that time, I'd get the dance down. Not the case, and my 2 p.m. I was getting pretty jittery, and had half-decided to not even try out. What was the point?
At 3, 4:30, and 5:55 I had class, each with 10 or 15 minutes of break in between, and the auditions started at 7:20pm. I had no time to practice, so all I could do was go through the dance over and over and over in my head. I sprinted to the dance studio after my last class, only to stare at the application sheet before I officially decided to audition. What was I doing? I didn't fit in with this group. I had never done hip-hop before. I wasn't at the same dance level as these dancers. I couldn't do it. I just couldn't.
But I did. I wrote my name and contact information down, and then gave me an indext card with the number 40 on it, and a safety pin (there were a total of 59 dancers auditioning). There was no getting out of it now.
I entered the studio to see most of the dancers at ease and excited. As the practice started, I noticed that the warm up was the same, but the audition dance was completely different. They were teaching us a completely new dance! All those hours of practice, and for nothing. Happily, the new dance was shorter, and slightly easier for me. I nearly had the moves down when they announced that auditions would start.
I waited outside with the rest, practicing and thinking and wondering whether I should leave now and avoid the humiliation or stick it out and see what happens. Before I knew it, they called my number along with 5 others, and we preformed infront of a panel of 3 judges. Oh, and it wasn't just the dance we had to perform...they asked us to freestyle too. FREESTYLE??? I had never done this before! What the hell was I supposed to do!?!?
I left the studio feeling confident that I had not made the team. And to some extent, I was relieved. If I had made it, then I'd have to go to practice and get to know these people and prove myself to them every time we danced. I didn't want all that pressure, and I was pleased that the audition went well and I gave it my all. I packed up my stuff and set out to leave, when someone told me to stay. What? Well...fine.
As soon as I sat down again to wait until everyone was done...they called my number to perform again. Hold up - this is a mistake right? But no, I went in and performed the routine again...this time with a little more attitude and more confidence in the moves. I left thinking "alright, that was probably the maybe group, where they didn't do so well the first time, but they're giving them another shot." So I pack everything up again and begin to leave, when they stop me AGAIN and tell me to wait until the end. Why the hell would you want to leave? Don't you want to stay and see the outcome? - I could read it on their faces, but I knew, deep down, that there was no way in hell I would be accepted.
So I wait a little while longer, and they call my number to perform AGAIN. Now I'm definitely sure that this is someone's idea of a great joke. But, I do the dance with hardly a move missed, and a much better freestyle ending. Good, now I can FINALLY get out of here. And yet again, they stop me in my tracks. I was forced to hear the results. Not 10 minutes later, the judges came out to us to announce who would be on the team.
They began by stating that the numbers NOT called were the ones that had not been chosen. The ones that were, however, were to stay and be welcomed into their new family of dancers. They called out 24 numbers...and number 40 was one of the last ones.
HOLY SHIT.
The more I thought about it, the more excited I got. I had made it! ME?! Of all people, me....this is what I've wanted to do for so long, and now, this is my chance. SWEETEST CURVE BALL EVER. All in all, that's how I made it onto the hip-hop dance group UrbanKnowlogy 101 here at Mason. This semester will certainly be difficult, but a hell of a lot interesting than any of the previous ones. And in some strange way, I can't wait to prove myself on the dance floor..not only to the group, but to all of the Mason campus.
Current Mood: |
FUCK YEAH |
Current Music: |
Beautiful World - Utada Hikaru | |
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the dreaded post-after-the-greatest-concert-EVER!!!! (a.k.a. the Silverchair concert...of amazing) Last night was truly one of the best nights of my life. For those who would like to know how it all went down
All in all….I can half-die happy now. Only half, since I’ve not seen Porno Graffitti live in concert yet. Oh wait, they’ll be at the wedding. I’ll just have to wait until then :D Love is Silverchair.
Current Mood: |
ecstatic |
Current Music: |
Silverchair | |
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......mmmm Silverchair is good.
Ok, so. What a week, eh? To recap - I saw some friends I hadn't seen in a while, I had an enlightening conversation with Alli, I have begun to sort through the largest and most difficult set in our Magic cards, I had a breakdown in the middle of the week, I've planned for a hiking trip this Saturday morning, and I have a long-term goal in mind that forces me to get up and go to the gym.
I think this is a step in the right direction. |
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SILVERCHAIR CONCERT SILVERCHAIR OMG SILVERCHAIR SILVERCHAIR CONCERT SILVERCHAIR DC SILVERCHAIR CONCERT CONCERT SILVERCHAIR SILVERCHAIRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D
Needless to say - I'm pumped about this concert. Only problem will be that my most recent ex will be there, and I hate him slightly...probably with his new gothic girlfriend too. Bitch, please.
BUT, I'm still going to see SILVERCHAIR whom I'm madly in love with. Look for me on the news guys - I plan on going to jail that night. I WILL get on stage and latch on to the lead singer.
In other news...WoW is quite fun. My Draenei Paladin is lvl 25, and she's adorable. I actually like being a Paladin, there are so many things that I can do. And my favored enemy is the undead, so I can do a ton of damage whenever I'm around them. My guild has some real crazies in it though....but, it always turns out in the end.
Work has been stealing my soul. I hate having only nights and weekends to myself, and I have a powerful urge to get out of town for a while. Perhaps a hike/camping trip, or the beach? Something - anything really.
Did I mention I have tickets to the Silverchair concert? :D :D :D
Current Music: |
SILVERCHAIR | |
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And I'm really just procrastinating before I dive back into this Formal Report for English. It's a fucking monster....so I probably should have started it 15 days ago. Le sigh... I have started to play WoW now....and that's a monster as well, but one that I fully intend to conquer. And the guys at my Woodbridge store flipped a shit when I said I'd start playing - they even went out and bought it for me. So, in thanks, I must create a character on their server. Hopefully they'll give me tons of stuff :D P.S. I hate dying in that game. And the Horde scares me slightly. I've decided that I love the 5th cd from Silverchair. It took a me a while to get used to it, but i knew I loved it as soon as I couldn't stop thinking about the songs. AND, I found The Dissociatives, which is pretty much the lead singer of Silverchair + some dance guy. The songs are a lot more...sound-ful, if that makes any sense. But it's fun, and I love the lyrics. And the melodies. And the...everything. OH - and I discovered that Silverchair will be performing at Lollapalooza in Chicago this August. The tickets are extremely expensive, but I'm going no matter what. I HAVE to see them. They're never in the states, so this is my chance :D Jess is back home, which makes me incredibly happy. I went to see Sipderman 3 with her the other day, and then we hit up Star Thai. Man, I love that place. Sadly, I haven't been able to play as much WoW with her as I would like, due to my last two finals coming up this week. Corey will also be back for good today from Longwood. I'm quite proud of him in getting his internship. He's pretty much the all-around-great-guy...but better. Lucky for me :D Arigatou Gozaimasu! Alright, back to the report....yay for looking into and comparing CEOs vs. Sales Managers......
Current Music: |
We're Much Preferred Customers - The Dissociatives | |
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So, this weekend I had some serious car problems. My brakes gave out as I was driving.....so, that was quite an adventure. After all was said and done, the total came to $460.00 - so I'm currently figuring out how I'm going to pay that off. But, it'll all be ok. I'm really getting into a rock group from Australia called Silverchair. I'm not too big a fan of their first 3 cds, but their 4th (Diorama) is magnificent. I've never been so into a rock group before (that didn't speak English), and that's seriously all I've been listening to recently. They actually just came out with their 5th cd (Young Modern) which is a pretty drastic change from Diorama. I'm still trying to figure out whether I like it or not....but I am a fan of this band, hands down. The lead singer's voice is very addicting...and I love his range. If they ever tour the U.S., I may have to try and see them. So, I've been talking an awful lot with this guy lately. He's kind of awesome, and he makes me feel pretty good about life. He's opptimistic and sarcastic all at the same time. It's really nice. I think I'll be able to see him this weekend, since he's coming back home (Fairfax) from Longwood. Funny, that I've known him for years since he's been coming into the Chantilly store, but we never talked. I thought he was too cool, and he thought I was too busy with all the guys....yuck, haha. So it's nice to talk with him. Is it terrible that I'm kind of hoping something comes of this? OH well, I'm just being honest, it's how I feel. Cindy's birthday today - YAY! I got her The Devil Wears Prada, a card, and flowers...plus I may pay for lunch for her and Padre. Who knows...I do have this evil car payment to deal with.... In other news....well that's pretty much it. Extremely sad to hear about Nick Napier...I can remember going to elementary, middle, and high school with him. Crazy, when things like that happen. I really can't get over it, it's pretty unreal. Also, miss my bestest. I can't wait to see her again, since she's going through all sorts of craziness at Tech. But it'll be alright, I know it will. Celebration FOREVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Hell yeah :D
Current Music: |
Diorama (album) - Silverchair | |
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So, I woke up early this morning to go to work, only to get violently ill. So, whatever I have better go away soon - I'm not a fan. In other news, life is pretty good. Getting work done, getting fencing stuff done, talking with people - it's pretty good. I know that I've got a ton of projects that are going to be due soon, so I'm trying to get myself organized so I can get some of it done now, since I know my weekend is going to be packed. Friday at 12 noon I'm hosting a fencing demonstration in the JC food court, so I really hope that that goes well...and I hope all my fencers show up. If not, I will destroy them :D Had a very nice Spring Break, but didn't get as much sleep as I would have liked. Made a new friend, and hung out with some good people. Worked a bit, too. It was pretty nice, overall. I can't wait until it gets warm - I plan on going hiking a ton. I need to get out of Northern Virginia for a bit, since it occasionally drives me insane. Saw 300 for a 3rd time this week with my room mate and father. That movie gets better each time. I appreciate the actors more now, since I watched a few of the behind-the-scenes videos of them working out. Needless to say, I wouldn't want to put myself through that. But, I like to think that I could. Who knows - anyway, it was quite impressive *now release your anger* So nothing much is really going on. I just go about my day, talking to pretty much only my room mates and my d&d group. Classes are boring, and I can't wait for this semester to be over and done with. Hope the stores are doing ok. We'll find out soon.
Current Music: |
Gone - Black Crows | |
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I won't go into details, but wow. I'm quite glad that week is over. The weekend was fun, since I went to Tech and spent some good time with my bestest. Talking about our future (and future dogs) with her really made me feel better about life. I needed that. Had a rough time with my parents over the weekend, but that was partly my fault. I have been sad and furious ever since Thursday, so it has been very difficult to keep my feelings in check. But even though I'm so upset, I feel that this is a good chance for me to channel my anger into something positive - like making myself FANTASTIC, and getting really intouch with my "inner self" - as awful and cliche as that sounds. I plan on taking some weekend day trips once it gets a little warmer, probably into the mountains to get some hiking done. I will also continue with my plan to go skydiving in a few months...or maybe sooner. I will be taking the rest of the semester (and then some) to focus on myself, my feelings, my body, and really figure out what I want. Oh....and no men. I'm currently on a man-hating rampage. :D
Current Mood: |
 furious | |
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Before heading back to school, Nick was kind enough to accompany me on a winter-getaway trip to Myrtle Beach this past weekend. I had a good time, although I think he would have been happier with a less touristy choice of beaches to visit, and with a lot less driving. We drove for about 8 hours on Friday, then wanted to see the Isle of Palms on Saturday (which was another 2 hour drive there and 2 hours back), then finally heading back on Sunday in the snow, making that an 8 to 9 hour drive. But along the way we had some good times: South of the Border, Myrtle Beach, Isle of Palms, and lots of restaurants. Some of the more funny experiences Nick and I had involved some of the places we ate at. We had seen signs the whole time driving down for a chain of fast food places called 'Bojangles'. I thought it was an odd name, and proceeded to crack jokes about it the entire trip, thus earning me the name "Baby Bojangles, Happy Feet's retarded cousin". Also, Nick and I stopped into a Waffle House on the way back from the Isle of Palms. There, we were greeted by a nice woman who sat us down and talked with us a bit. After our food had arrived, she went back to talking with another co-worker, and continued on a rant that was taking place before we entered the restaurant. She seemed to be on a serious man-hating rage, and one of the funniest lines she said was "Men are worthless tits on a boar-hog!". Nick and I did everything in our power to keep our laughter in check. Below are a mix of pictures that Nick and I took on our vacation.
Current Mood: |
calm |
Current Music: |
Across the night - Silverchair | |
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Yesterday I was invited to go to New York City with a relatively-new friend I've made this semester. She called me, asked me what I was up to, and then told me to pack because she had made us reservations at a hotel in Times Square as part of my birthday gift (that PLUS transportation). Random and spontaneous? Yes. I only wish that I could take some people with me, but this will be a good time for me to get to know her (and her fiance, since he's coming as well!) I only hope we're not mugged....but if that happens, at least I'll have a story to share when I get back. I leave today, see ya Friday!
Current Music: |
Feeling Good - Michael Buble | |
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Had a great New Years Eve this time around - consisting of food, drinks, and Cranium :D I won't dive into details, but the pictures may explain enough about it...
Current Mood: |
cheerful | |
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